A Lifetime of Walking With Jesus

A Lifetime of Walking With Jesus

Sunday, May 11, 2025

6:14 AM

Some of us spend a lifetime with Jesus.  We remember knowing Him for the earliest times of life and now that we are old, we know Him as well as we know ourselves.  He has always been that whisper in our ears.  He has always shown His love through protection and guidance.  He speaks through others and speaks through His words in the Bible.  He shows Himself to those who are seeking Him and listening for His voice.

John 10:27 (NIV)

My sheep listen to my voice; I know them, and they follow me.

John 10:14 (NIV)

I am the good shepherd; I know my sheep and my sheep know me—

John 10:16 (NIV)

I have other sheep that are not of this sheep pen. I must bring them also. They too will listen to my voice, and there shall be one flock and one shepherd.

Ezekiel 34:31 (NIV)

You are my sheep, the sheep of my pasture, and I am your God, declares the Sovereign Lord.

John 10:4 (NIV)

When he has brought out all his own, he goes on ahead of them, and his sheep follow him because they know his voice.

Now that I am old mother, grandmother, great grandmother, and widow I find that I am speaking with and to Him throughout the day.  He is my constant companion now that my husband is gone, and all of my children and grandchildren have moved to other parts of the country.  Life is very different than it was when we were a family jumping from days to days filled with school, sports, jobs, home, family, friends, church and all that goes on in the decades of life.

To be honest there are days when I feel lonely and separated from everyone and everything.  My body, spirit and mind are on my age and knowing the majority of the decades are over and there are only a couple of them left for my lifetime.  It's a strange feeling and strange thoughts thinking about the end of life.  I praise the Lord I am fairly healthy with only some extra pounds, some creaking joints wrinkles, white hair and aging skin.  I am very slow when it comes to home projects, and I love to sit and read as much as possible. 

I was only retired for one year when my husband died in September of 2022.  I was working from home in 2020 due to Covid and then retired in 2021 and took care of him for almost 2 years as his health quickly deteriorated after he took 3 Covid vaccines in 2021.  We know now the shots altered the immune system and he already had a compromised immune system due to 50 years of Rheumatoid Arthritis.  There is a possibility he could have lived more years had he not taken the vaccines but that is now water under the proverbial bridge.  He is gone.  I am 70 years old.  I have to life live alone without my earthly helpmate.  I have a huge learning curve going on at this point in life.

I have been telling everyone that I feel as if I am a 19-month toddler, learning how to walk and talk on my own.  I have 2 great granddaughters that are 21 months old and 33 months old.  The walking and running part they, both have down pretty good.  The talking is coming along with the older one and the littler one is picking up some words.  Both continue to grow in all aspects of life on earth. 

Me, on the other hand, I am slow to learn and slow to move.  Sometimes I am like that defiant toddler that crosses her arms and says, "No! I don't want to!"  

Then Holy Spirit whispers in my ears, "You're doing fine.  Stop thinking you are going to make it through this life change so quickly. It takes time to adapt to a life without your husband and helpmate, the one you spent 40 years of life with.  Why do you think you are going to move through this so fast and not learn the lessons I have for you?"

When I hear Him speak these words to me, I sigh and think of how caring and wonderful He is to me and has been to be for 70 years of life.  He has walked with me when I was a total rebel.  He stood by and protected me when I walked in the world of fleshly sin and earthly ambitions.  He has taught me over an over many lessons and tried His best to instill wisdom and knowledge into me.  He has blessed my children and my grandchildren with the knowledge of who He is and what He does in a life of those who give their hearts to Him.  

Today is Mother's Day and I am at the home of my son and daughter-in-law.  I am thankful that I am still able to drive 150 miles to be with them.  I am thankful they want me for 4 days in their home.  I love them.  I miss my daughter who lives in Colorado with her family but know I will see her soon at a granddaughter's graduation celebration in a month.  I know my children and my grandchildren love me and pray for me.  I know that walking with the Lord is a daily walk just like getting out of bed each morning.  I am thankful beyond measure for the many, many blessings of my life.  It's still a new path and new season of life but I want for nothing other than to be as energetic and able as I was when I was 30 or 40 years old.  

Keep me going on this path you have for me Lord and show me your will for the days ahead.  In your name Jesus, I pray!