The days have all melted together for the past 4 month since we were hit with the Coronavirus. Nothing has been normal and nothing will be normal again since it has gone on this long. Personally, it has been a very testing time for me. I have always thought I would get through anything but this one has me sitting on the sidelines looking at the days flash by like never before.
I have been strong in the Lord for 40 plus years and even this has me questioning my life choices. There are no questions of the Lord, only myself. I have been fairly complacent as the days have moved on. I have not fretted too much or complained excessively. I have mostly hunkered down waiting for whatever to happen, to happen. For 4 months nothing much has happened. Except for 126 passing by and 20 pounds of extra weight on my already extra 30 pounds. I eat, sleep, and work.
With all of this said, I had to ask the Lord,
"Why do you want me to write again? I really don't want to put down my complaints and my negativity. I just want to quietly sit by and watch as the days move by."
"Many, many, many, are feeling like you. They are exhausted by the days of this terrible ordeal. The fear for them is overwhelming at times and they have to tell themselves to breathe. Their hearts hurt. Their minds are spinning out of control. They can't focus on the good in life. All they hear is the bad. They need some hope and some assurance that one day they will begin to heal. They would certainly heal faster if they would come to me and let me carry their burdens. But their stubbornness and pride prevent them from seeking me."
"Lord, I can't help them with my words. I am having a hard time too."
"I know Daughter, but you have a way of telling others that things will be alright, even when times are dark. You have a way to soften the feelings of others with just a simple expression of faith and love. Your words have been my words for years and you should know that by now. Just look at what I have accomplished through you with your simple words."
"Alright, Lord. I will do as you ask and try to speak from your heart, to mine, to them."
So here we are listeners. Here I am writing again. I really never expected to write about faith and hope during a pandemic. I really never expected there to be riots, looting, killing, and threats of ending the American dream with socialism, communism, and Marxism rapping on the door of our free, independent nation. I never expected a brain tumor almost 2 years ago either, but here we are. Life is different and becoming increasing different each and every day. There is not one single person who can tell you what tomorrow will bring.
The point of all of this is that only the Creator of the Universe knows what is happening. Even if you are not a believer you have to admit that something supernatural is happening on earth today. We can question every single thing and we will still find we have no answers. We can cry and scream and throw a tantrum which will change nothing. There is not one human being who can change what has happened and what is going to happen. This is the point in life where we finally admit defeat. We can change nothing. We can postpone things by running away. We can hide and hope tomorrow does not find us. There it is. The only real answer. You can run, but you cannot hide.
There is a time in every single human life on this planet where there is a question about life and death. Why are we born? Why do we die? All of your friends will give you their opinion of life and you get to decide if you want to find answers for yourself or assume they know what they are talking about and just accept their path. If you are a follower, you will let them lead you on their path, which will not be your own. If you are more of a leader, you will listen to your friends, but then make your own choices. If you are a fence sitter, you will just keep sitting there, hoping to fall off the fence on the right side when the time comes.
As I write this, my only advice would be, decide for yourself. Don't let others choose your path to faith, truth, hope, and love. None of us have chosen this path of living in a pandemic, living in a season of terrorism and turmoil, and watching others try to take away the dreams of all who live in America. I would encourage you to be a leader in your own life, not a follower of someone else or a fence sitter. At least wake up and search for something. Search for something good even when it doesn't look so good. Try to find a positive amongst all of the negative. Be different. Do something different than what everyone else is doing.
I'm writing again. I'm hearing again. I'm speaking out again. I want everyone to know that your choices can be what makes all the difference in your world. Choose wisely.
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